What Is a Spreader Bar - and How to Use It for Sexy, Satisfying Restraint Play

New to spreader bars? Here’s what they are, how to use one, and how to turn your next sex session into a wide-open invitation for control.

You’ve probably seen them in kink photos: legs spread wide, wrists pulled apart, bodies helplessly exposed and completely available.

Hot, right?

That’s the magic of a spreader bar—one of the simplest, sexiest tools in the bondage toy box. Whether you’re new to BDSM or ready to level up your restraint play, this guide will show you exactly:

• What a spreader bar is
• How to use a spreader bar in and out of the bedroom
• And how to turn it into a fantasy you’ll crave again and again

Let’s get into it—and spread it open.

What Is a Spreader Bar?

A spreader bar is a rigid bar (usually metal or hard plastic) with attachment points on either end—used to hold the limbs apart during bondage play.

Most commonly:

• Ankles are clipped to each end → legs stay spread
• Wrists can be clipped for arm restraint
• You can even use both at once—fully restrained, wide open, and begging to be used

Spreader bars force the body into an open position, restricting movement and increasing feelings of exposure, helplessness, and sexual vulnerability.

Why People Love Spreader Bars

• Hands-free restraint: no knots or cuffs required
• Positions the body perfectly for teasing, fucking, spanking, or orgasm denial
• Enhances the visual aesthetics of submission
• Great for D/s play, humiliation, edging, service kink, and more
• Restricts closing the legs or hiding arousal—a complete surrender of control

Recommended: Start with a Beginner-Friendly Spreader Bar

If you’re new to this toy, look for:

• Adjustable length to suit different body sizes & positions
• Padded ankle or wrist cuffs for comfort
• Quick-release clips for safety and confidence

Shop our beginner-friendly spreader bars here →

How to Use a Spreader Bar – Step-by-Step

1. Choose Your Target: Legs, Arms, or Both

Most people start with ankles, spreading the legs open and holding them in place.
You can also use wrist cuffs, binding the arms wide and exposing the chest or back.

Try:

• Legs spread on the bed during oral or penetration
• Arms spread while standing for visual domination
• Behind-the-back restraint for full-body control 

2. Adjust the Bar Length

Most spreader bars are adjustable.

• Shorter bars keep the legs open but easy to move
• Longer bars create total exposure and helplessness
• Advanced players use double bars (arms + legs)

Explore our adjustable and dual-attachment spreader bars →

3. Choose the Right Position

Here are a few to try:

• Lying flat with legs spread (ideal for oral or vibrator teasing)
• On all fours, ankles restrained for rear-entry access
• Standing arms spread against a wall or doorway
• Suspension or over-the-door setups (advanced only!) 

Use a spreader bar on the bed, floor, chair, or even furniture—you don’t need a dungeon to enjoy domination.

4. Combine with Other Toys

Make the scene hotter by combining your spreader bar with:

• Blindfolds → sensory deprivation
• Vibrators → helpless pleasure
• Floggers → impact play while restrained
• Gags → silence while wide open
• Collars & leashes → obedience training

Shop full BDSM accessory kits here →

How to Use a Spreader Bar for Sex

Alright, let’s get naughty.

Position 1: The Oral Throne

Have your partner lie back, legs in the air, ankles clipped to the spreader bar. You kneel between them and take your time. They won’t be able to close their legs—even if they beg.

Perfect for:

• Oral sex
• Licking and teasing
• Vibrator edging

Position 2: Face Down, Ass Up

Place the bar between their ankles while they’re on all fours. Their legs are forced wide apart, exposing everything. Slide a pillow under their hips and use your hands—or your toys.

Perfect for:

• Doggy style
• Anal play
• Spanking or flogging

Position 3: Standing & Owned

Use a doorway or St. Andrew’s cross. Clip their wrists to a spreader bar and attach it to eye-level hooks. Arms wide, legs shaking, mouth open. You decide what happens next.

Perfect for:

• Visual submission
• Breath play (with caution)
• Full-body exposure and control

Products That Make Spreader Bar Play Even Hotter

• Adjustable Spreader Bar with Ankle Cuffs – For classic restraint
• Dual Bar System (Wrists + Ankles) – For complete control
• Padded Cuffs Set – Soft on skin, strong on control
• Spreader Bar & Collar Kit – For obedience and domination
• Bondage Tape or Blindfold Add-On – Sensory overload combo

Explore the full Spreader Bar Collection →

Spreader Bar FAQ

Q: Can beginners use a spreader bar?
A: Absolutely. Start with ankle restraint and soft cuffs. It’s a low-risk, high-pleasure intro to bondage.

Q: Does it hurt?
A: It shouldn’t. Choose padded cuffs and avoid hyper-stretching. Always check in with your partner and communicate.

Q: Can I use a spreader bar without a bed or bondage furniture?
A: Yes! Use it on the floor, with a chair, or standing against a wall. It’s super versatile.

Q: Is it for solo or partner play?
A: Mostly partner-focused—but some submissives enjoy being restrained alone, edged with toys, or filmed for later.

Ready to Spread the Pleasure?

Now that you know what a spreader bar is and how to use one... why not make it your new favorite bedroom weapon?

Explore our Spreader Bar collection and find the perfect one for your next scene →

And if you love being restrained, exposed, and taken just the way they want?

You might also love our guide to Bondage Tape Ideas →
Because sometimes… being spread wide is just the beginning.